Let me be clear -- I have never claimed to be a genius (well maybe once or twice) but I will say I am a relatively intelligent woman. Which makes it extremely odd that I should utter the phrases "huh?," "I have no clue," and/or "what the $%#@&" every single day.
What is that all about? Truth is -- I couldn't tell you. Mostly everything and everyone confuses the daylights out of me. Go figure. It's gotten to the point where I make that squinty-eyed face (you know -- the one that you typically make when saying "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?") so often that I am afraid my mother will be right and my face will stay like that forever. Which may not be a bad thing. It would save me the energy of having to contract all those muscles to contort my face at least five to six times a day (more if a workday and I am in the office).
What's with being so complicated -- or more specifically -- unclear???? It drives me nuts (as does the sound of nails being clipped but that's for another blog). One of my favorite statements (and I am pretty sure the one that keeps me single) is "Clarity is the most precious gift." You don't have to be the smartest, the nicest, the best looking, the richest -- you just have to be clear! OK...you know where this is going...in the direction of you guys (although there are plenty of woman who are guilty in this arena). "Why do you want to make me nuts?" It's not like I need any additional help getting there for crying out loud!
I have a beautiful friend who is writing a book titled "The Y Chromosome: Why?" Aside from being a very clever and funny name -- it is true. "Why???????"
Why don't you do what you say?
Why don't you say what you do?
Why don't you do what I say?
Say, is that what you want me to do?
Why? What are you trying to say?
Why not?
Do you not understand why?
And last but not least...Why are you driving me nuts?
I love you but I hate you. I am interested so I am going to ignore you. I'm not into you but kiss me. I like pears but pears give me a rash. We make a great pair but I need to fly solo. Make sure to call me but I won't answer. Marry me...nahhh, I was kidding, I really don't want a wife. Go out with me...oh I can't because I have a wife. ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHH! Questa tortura non finisce mai! (This torture never ends.)
S-P-E-L-L I-T O-U-T P-L-E-A-S-E (or I will have to write you off)...that goes if you are male, female, family, friend, colleague, love interest, whatever -- be clear. Some may be saying "Wow -- she's drawing the line in the sand." What I am really doing is sharing what it takes to play nice in the sandbox. And there's the rub...every unclear answer, every indifference, ambiguity, purposeful omission or scarcity of fact, thought or emotion, amounts to someone who really does not want to play nicely with you. Face it -- being clear is also bestowing respect and appreciation. Ahhhhhhh, I'm on a roll...in two minutes I'll be able to connect lack of clarity to global warming ...I already know it is behind the recession, higher divorce rates, less happy people, and loneliness...and quite possibly, vegetarianism. (C'mon can you really trust someone who won't eat a cheeseburger?)
Anyway, I love knowing where I stand -- wherever it is. Doesn't necessarily mean I get what I want -- but it prevents me from wasting my energy on those people, projects and personalities that do not deserve it...and giving all that and more to the precious tesori (treasures) in my life that do. Sounds simple, right? You would think. Who knows? Very few apparently.
Clearly, I am trying to make a point here.
Gotta go (figure).
-Andy
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3 comments:
A beautifully written blog as always my dear and you are right Clarity is king. I do have a little difference of opinion in one aspect and I can't believe I am going to cross this divide. Men are not the only ones who are not clear in a relationships, let's be honest we all know women who want something out of a relationship with a guy & are not very clear themselves (I have suffered that problem throughout my life and so have many of my friends). We may not misrepresent or tell falsehoods to get what we want (as some of your examples did / do) but we do not always get right to the point. What makes it even more interesting is those women who are strong and get to the point in their day to day lives don't usually do that in personal relationships!~... We all have a lot to learn about Clarity and it begins with something a very wise friend told me this weekend "just get passed the grilled cheese"!!!!!
I hear ya -- but all I can say is that time is a'wastin' -- get with the program and be clear! Lay it on the table (or wherever else works) and stop torturing yourself!
Yeah, yeah, yeah - I get it clarity is important - but what about more blogs! We are not going to change the world in a day or in one blog. Let's keep telling them OVER and OVER ad nauseum that all we want - even if we cringe and hiss and spit as they tell us - is THE TRUTH. OK. here's the the real question - "Are we all sure we can HANDLE the truth? If yes, steel yourself up - (in the contemporary sense MAN UP!)Let people know you can handle what they have to say. Wimpiness has stolen CLARITY. Long live "Blurting Things Out" - Give us another insightful Blog Ms Andy! We need more straightening out!
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